When did you start to love your baby?

Stone · 11-22-2004, 10:16 AM

When I was 1st pregnant w/ Noah I loved him the minute I found out I was pregnant, i was so happy I wanted to tell everyone, I couldn't wait to be a mother.

Now that I am pregnant with this one, I do not feel the same way, I do not feel like I love this baby now, and it is freaking me out, I feel like an Alien with no heart. and I am in a better situation now then I was when I had Noah.

Is this common? Do you think I am not as excited because I already have a child? I really want to love it and be happy, But I can't.

I can't stop crying because I feel like this...... freaking hormones :?

Merika · 11-22-2004, 10:33 AM

As I've said on other posts....I felt the same way when I was pregnant with Sn00py (screenname...I didn't NAME him that in real! HAHA!)

I got pregnant at a time when the marriage was already in shambles, I had cervical cancer and I didn't want another child. I felt that way until he was born. I was so embarassed before God because I didn't want the baby at all.

And then the moment he was born... I loved him with more passion than one could imagine. As a matter of fact, I still do.

In your case, you already have a child which demands special attention and having another baby is probably feeling overwhelming. Those feelings will change down the road though. Just give it time....

Remember....Star wasn't real excited over the prospect of rasing a grandchild till the time came....now she is in baby heaven just as happy as she can be.

Stone · 11-22-2004, 10:39 AM

Thanks Merika, I even felt bad at church yesterday I prayed to have god help me love my baby but it isn't working. I guess there are underlying issues that are causing this.

I really feel like white trash, I am only 24 and now I have 2 kids by 2 diffrent fathers, I never wanted my life to end up this way. I wish I could take a magic pill to be happy but I really don't see it happening. Everybody who knows is excited and my reaction is not how they expect. I guess it makes me look like a peice of crap when people bring me flowers and congradulation cards and I just look puzzled and miserable. I wish I could hide for 9 months.

Merika · 11-22-2004, 11:52 AM

I could understand why you are feeling less than excited over getting pregnant at a inconvenient time.....but most pregnancies do seem to happen that way. In the end though....they seem to work out just fine.

It doesn't matter if you have two children from two different guys. Unless you never planned to have another baby....the next one would've been from another guy as well.

Have you and Greg talked about getting married since you are pregnant?

Stone · 11-22-2004, 01:10 PM

We talk back and forth about it, I want to get married because I want us all to have the same last name and if we're not married before the baby is born it's getting my last name.... do you think that is mean?

Star · 11-22-2004, 03:54 PM

I started loving my babies as soon as I found out I was pregnant. Though unexpected, I was happy and loved them from the very beginning.

I loved my grand-daughter from the first time my daughter told me she was pregnant also. I love my grand-daughter as much as I do my own children.

Duke · 11-22-2004, 11:40 PM

It took me 8 months before I started loving my daughter.

Stone · 11-23-2004, 09:13 AM

Duke 8 months pregnant or 8 months old?

Adonaicole · 11-23-2004, 09:46 AM

I loved my son at conception...it was Valentines Day (which explains why my ex consented to making love that day).

Merika · 11-23-2004, 12:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Adonaicole

...it was Valentines Day (which explains why my ex consented to making love that day).

HAHA Adonai!

Meanon · 11-23-2004, 04:07 PM

With me it was instant but then both were planned pregnancies.

Stoneheather, some people don't love their baby straight away even when it's born but they soon bond when they start to care for the child. Don't worry, it will come. Just as the hormones are making you feel bad now, so the maternal instinct will kick in with time.

I got married when I was 3 months pregnant because I wanted us all to have the same name.

Don't feel bad about yourself, stoneheather. You wanted another child and your ex was a lost cause so there were always going to be two biological Fathers. Your bf is Noah's Daddy. There's a lot to be said for getting the early years out of the way together - they will be more company for each other and you still be young enoughto party when your youngest has left home!!

I bet you'll feel better in the next trimester.

Duke · 11-23-2004, 08:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Stoneheather

Duke 8 months pregnant or 8 months old?

8 months old :oops: