What does being a good parent mean...

[Duke]

...to you? You don't need to have kids to answer this question, I'm just curious.

For me it's the following:

- being honest with your child and with yourself.
- communication including, but not limited to, moods, wants, needs, desires, stresses, pressure, etc. I also mean not just hearing of your childs issues, but your child hearing of some of yours. I believe this makes you more human in your childs eyes.
- admitting to fault as a parent. Too often parents are always right and that's complete bull.
- never embarass your child unless they embarassed you first.
- random discipline. I belive the three strike your out rule teaches your kids to push you the first two times.
- no hitting, very little yelling. I only condone yelling as it is necessary once in a while but then you must explain to your child why you yelled.
- taking time for just you and your child. Pick a time when nothing else will distract you from your child.
- telling your child you love them. I don't care if you say it a thousand times a day, the message will get through. Say it once in a while and can you be sure your child heard you?
- being close. I rub my daughters hair if she's laying down, kiss her forehead when she's sleeping, even tell her I love her in the middle of the nite when she's sleeping.

This may sound totally wuss of me, but I believe it's very important for every parent to do stuff like this. I believe it's even more important if you are male to be quite honest. Ask 100 kids if their moms loved them and it's likely 90% will say yes, ask the same 100 kids if dad loved them and I'll be suprised if 25% can say yes for sure.

[darkangelism]

Tell the truth, but keeping stuff from children when its in the best interest of the family.

Show emotion, love, anger, sad, hope, all of it...i grew up in a house where there was little emotion.

set limits and enforce them, punish when needed.

Be there for them, show up to events and know whats going on in their life.

Give them confidence, that they can do whatever they want.

Teach them the value of money, and that they have to work for it.

Allow them to explore and find their passions.

Further their knowledge with art, science and music.

Make sure they eat well, and excercise regularly.

[Star]

To me, being a good parent are the following:

Communication: You have to talk about anything and everything under the sun to your child. They need to know that they can talk to you about anything, no matter what it is, without feeling embarrassed or afraid they'll get into trouble over it. Never stop talking about sex and drugs from the time that you start the topic. I started talking to my kids about sex at age 7, drugs at age 5 and strangers since they started to talk. Those topics never stopped in my household.

Discipline: You have to punish the child when he/she does something wrong. Along with the punishment, you need to talk to them and let them know why they're being punished and talk to them about the wrong thing they did. Use a technique of punishment that works with your child. Disciplining one child one way may not work with your other child. Every kid is different.

Love: Show your child every single day how much you love them. Tell them those 3 little words often, hug them, cuddle with them and kiss them. The more affection they recieve, the easier it will be for them to show it to others in the future. Tell them you love them even if they've done something wrong. They need to know that your love for them is unconditional.

Answer their questions: I'm a true believer that if they're old enough to ask, they're old enough to know. I've always answered my kid's questions honestly no matter what the question was. This builds the trust they have for you as a parent.

Honesty: Being honest with your child is always a rule. I've always believed in "say it like it is" and it has worked for me. For example, to stop my kids from running into the street, I'd tell them like it is. "You run out there, a car will come and hit you, squish you like a bug and you'll end up dead and buried". They never ran out on that street. It sounds harsh but it's for their own safety and it is the truth. that's what can happen.

Respect: For a parent to have respect from their child, a parent has to respect their child. We are their role model in life so we have to teach them these things. To recieve respect, it must be earned. As bad as Krystal is now, I still show her some respect; even if I don't get much respect from her in return. Talk to you children with respect and they will talk to you with respect.

Quality time: quality time with your child is so important. They need that one on one time where all your attention is on them and only them. I call this "mommy/daughter time" in my house. We'll go out and do something special just the 2 of us. gerry does the same.

Be involved: You need to be involved with teir school activities or any other activities they may have outside school. You need to be involved and know who their friends are. You need to know where your kids go when they do go out with friends and what they do with them. I drive my daughter everywhere she needs to go and pick her back up afterwards. Gerry and I have always went to their school activities and still do.

A good parent never dismantles their child's self-esteem and self-confidence. As a parent, we want our kids to have high levels of these so they can lead a productive happy life. We're not only parents, but their best friend as well. Kassandra's always telling me that I am her best friend. That feels really good. I know i've done my job right when I hear those words. There is a good balance between being their friend and parent. :wink: