My teenage daughter is approaching 16 years old, 16 in 6 months, and I've come to notice that she is becoming more and more of a drama queen.
At first I thought it was more of an act because, well because she's my daughter and I act like an idiot much of the time just for a chuckle. The thing is though that I believe that the drama she's expressing is actually becoming a major part of her persona.
While I can't say whether or not I actually like/dislike the drama queen attitude, sometimes it can be a bit much and I have to remind myself it's a phase (or so I hope).
Since I've never had a sister I'm really not equipped to deal with a teenage drama queen.
Does anyone here have any tips on how I should act or what I should do to communicate a bit more effectively?
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I had a teenage daughter too at one time but to be honest she never really was a drama queen ever. I don't know how to help you here but if it is a bit much for the situation maybe you need to just tell her to calm down. Whatever the drama of the day is, it will pass.
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Seriously, I have no advice. I am only blessed / cursed with two younger brothers.
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Duke, don't sweat it, it's a stage. Some get through it sooner than others. I don't have any real concrete advice even after two step daughters who are now 21 and 22. I always just tried to listen, show them respect, tried to treat them like adults, and love and support them.
That's about all you can do because before you know it, they are all grown up....for the most part.
I was reminded of this just yesterday. Daughter came home Monday night since she had some things to do in town the next day. I had dinner ready when she got home and we spent the evening just "hanging out". She left early in the afternoon but when I came home, I found a container of chinese food in the fridge which was leftover from her lunch. She had a nice note written on it about how she made me dinner. Over the last 6 months we have become much closer but it's interesting that I don't really look at her like a little girl anymore. She's a complicated, driven, hard working and caring woman. These are things I know no one in her "real" family see's at all and I think that's sad. Too bad for them because they can't see what they are missing. Pretty cool for me to be a part of her life.
Anyway I thought I'd just share that. Do the best you can and it will work out in the end.
I kind of figured it was a stage that I'd have to get used to, I just didn't expect it to be the challenge that it is. Of all the stages that my daughter has been through, this one seems to have swung her personality in a direction I'm simply not accustomed to seeing.
It's not necessarily a good thing, it's not necessarily a bad thing, just different and sometimes difficult to understand.
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It's entirely normal and it's better expressed than repressed (within reason). My advice: be calm and sympathetic, weather the storms and when they blow out, offer a cuddle.
It won't last, Duke. I've tried to think that my son and I are close, even through the teenage years. He was a lot more gracious to me than I was with my parents, but it still hurt. He has said some pretty hurtful things to me while growing up and has tried to run away at least 3 times. Even at 20 years old, he still wants to move out (which is understandable) but it is usually because of some type of discord we've had between us. Since he's aged, the regular bickering of living together has silenced a lot. He even remembered my birthday this year without any reminder and gave me a huge bear hug. He hasn't done that in years.
Some say that if your children don't try to detach themselves from you or hate you for awhile, that you didn't do your job as a parent. Your daughter is not only having hormonal surges, she is seeking individuality and it hurts parents really bad. She'll be back eventually. Try not to take it personally. It's just a sign that you were a terrific parent!
You know Ivy this doesn't happen often to me but reading your post actually brought tears to my eyes so BIG Thank You!
I've done all I can for my daughter and will continue to do so as long as there is breath remaining in my lungs. I know she's starting to build a life of her own and for a life to be her own it has to be built by her sans parents. I know it, I did it myself but it doesn't make it less painful to see happen when all you can visualize is the little girl who had to hold my hand all the time.
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Not much one can do, sorry, duke... turning into a woman, discovering the effect she can have on the others, the flattery, the jitters, the emotions - lots of new things that can cloud any person's mind, especially a 16 year old .
I think it's important to stay connected to her, talk to her, be part of her life, ask her to talk to you about her friends and main events in her life and, with a bit of help, you will help her balance the "drama queen" side with her true self .
PAtience and perseverance, my friend!
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Thanks twinkle for the insight. I just knew asking you fine folks would help provide me with insight I just could not have gotten alone!
I'll continue to do all I can to stay connected as I'm sure you all probably know by now. I think the one thing that will be difficult though is just keeping it to the level of communication she wants to share and not try and prod the stuff from her that she doesn't want to share.
You know something funny, after looking over this topic it appears as if she's is the teenager yet I'm the one being the drama queen
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Trust me, Duke. You really don't want to know every little detail. LOL! I sure thought I did and my son got real chummy with me a few times, told me some things going on in his little circle of friends that made my stomach a little sour.
Wait until she gets her first date. I didn't realize how I'd react to that with mine. I use to think parents were weird for getting uncomfortable, like it was a sexual/strange relationship, but I quickly found out what it's all about. Yet again, hard to explain. LOL!
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Trust me, Duke. You really don't want to know every little detail. LOL! I sure thought I did and my son got real chummy with me a few times, told me some things going on in his little circle of friends that made my stomach a little sour.
Wait until she gets her first date. I didn't realize how I'd react to that with mine. I use to think parents were weird for getting uncomfortable, like it was a sexual/strange relationship, but I quickly found out what it's all about. Yet again, hard to explain. LOL!
If given the choice I'd much rather know too much than not enough. As for discomfort, I've surpassed all the years combined since she turned 9 so now I'm developing callouses.
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My Daughter Rules!
Ofear.com: Peer support forum addressing phobias, panic attacks, OCD, symptoms, treatments, etc.
Movie Talk: Discussing upcoming, current and even past movie titles.
I don't have any real concrete advice even after two step daughters who are now 21 and 22. I always just tried to listen, show them respect, tried to treat them like adults, and love and support them. 
Over the last 6 months we have become much closer but it's interesting that I don't really look at her like a little girl anymore. She's a complicated, driven, hard working and caring woman. These are things I know no one in her "real" family see's at all and I think that's sad. Too bad for them because they can't see what they are missing. Pretty cool for me to be a part of her life. 
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