Online Dating

[Merika]

Originally Posted by darkangelism

(when i used online dating i emailed every pretty girl on there,

HAHA DA. A woman could weigh 300 pounds and have a horn growing out of her forehead and get dates on some of those sites! About 4 years ago...I posted on some date site with a female friend of mine. We both got close to 35 emails a piece in 2 hours. We ran into a sailor who was stationed in Georgia (over an hour away) and he actually drove down with a buddy just to buy us beer in a bar we agreed to meet at that afternoon.

[Vautrin]

DA: How did you do that? With a general message, or going indepth on the points they raised in their profiles?

If you do the last, you increase your chances dramatically. And if you are sensitive about the points they raised, and not writing verbatim what they wrote, further increases may be expected.

Don't write too much about their photographs / beauty, if at all. It makes women think you are after them for the "benefits."

[Stone]

Originally Posted by Vautrin

SH: I don't think it's an addiction problem. After all, the addiction would still exist once in a relationship. If it really was a sexual addiction, and your bfs could not perform for one reason or another, you would have sought for gratification outside the relationship, at these times.

:? I did

[Stone]

Originally Posted by Merika

SH...I guess the question would be...do you really WANT to sleep with everyone you date (which is fine if that's a person's choice) or do you just end up getting in that position (no pun intended) because you don't feel you have anything else to offer?

I know I have alot to offer that isn't the problem. I think I am just a sex feen it's some type of power trip I think that's why I loved dancing at the club. Some wacked out power trip that give's me some weird satisfaction.... I'm just friggin nuts :?

[darkangelism]

at least you admit its a problem.


vaturin, i used a generic message, copy and paste for dozens of girls a day.

[Vautrin]

DA. Instead of emailing dozens of girls a day, it is better to write to two or three, and use the information in their profiles. Share a bit of you, tell a bit of them, and what you think of the information they entered in a profile.

Even though they won't respond all, you improve your chances a lot. Give them something to think about, and make them known you are interested in them SPECIFICALLY. If a girl has an exotic interest which you also have, share that information. Use words to suggest a bond between you 2.

[darkangelism]

i have pretty much given up on online dating.

[Stone]

Originally Posted by darkangelism

i have pretty much given up on online dating.

WHY I would assume that most people lie. or thats what I've heard.. but I have meet some great friends online that I am sure don't lie. so this is where I am confused.

[Vautrin]

Sadly because most people online, lie about themselves. I have been lucky, and have met a few great friends online, who live on different ends of the world. Sometimes it is hard, because of cultural differences.

Given my interests, if you share them with me, I am always interested. In the city where I live (200,000 people) I haven't found a soul who shares these interests.

Most often I do get to know them at first, before forming friendships. Also, and this may seem strange, I am very picky in who I give my attention to.

SH, a lot of people can lie, and get away with it. The same is true in real life. A lot of people depend on body language. Which is lacking on internet forums.
It might also be a problem when you are dating. You might date a confident guy "body language-wise", but a not so healthy guy judging by his words.

[Stone]

Aint that the truth!

[Vautrin]

SH: Take a psychologist with you, on your next dates

[darkangelism]

Originally Posted by Stoneheather

WHY I would assume that most people lie. or thats what I've heard.. but I have meet some great friends online that I am sure don't lie. so this is where I am confused.

That isnt why i gave up, i gave up because it wasnt working, very few would respond. I got discouraged.

[Merika]

On those dating sites.....they can be a very shallow arena. Most females get tons and tons of replies....so they sort thru them without great thought.

[Vautrin]

Originally Posted by darkangelism

Vautrin, i used a generic message, copy and paste for dozens of girls a day.

Originally Posted by Merika

On those dating sites.....they can be a very shallow arena. Most females get tons and tons of replies....so they sort thru them without great thought.

I think the problem is simply the generic message DA uses.

You are simply not after a few dozen girls to date. And certainly not after a few dozen girls to start a relationship with. One will suffice. So the focus should be on quality of message to the intended receivers.

Of course the women weed out the standard messages. They will look for guys with something more. Who can talk about her interests, who can be sensitive if needed, et cetera. Depends a bit on the woman, true. You must appear as a serious guy, and not as just a guy(who is after some action), if the women are looking for relationships.

True, dating sites can be very shallow. But so can meeting in the real world be. For instance, I was rejected once for a relationship, because the girl was maybe an inch taller than I was. Somehow all my qualities did not matter anymore; qualities she greatly admired.

[Samson]

Online dating seems to be the next-to-last-act of desperation just before an individual immerses himself in learning how to speak fluent Klingon.

However, I'm certain that as with almost everything some have managed to master the technique enough to target, and be targeted, with normally satisfactory results.