How Do You Say "Sorry"?

[Luba]

Some scenarios:
(1) You're busy, but your partner wants to tell you something important, you cut him/her off...how would you apologize?
(2) Your partner thought he/she looked really good in an outfit, and you made fun of it...how would you apologize?
(3) You had a bad day at the office and you took it out on your partner..how would you apologize?
(4) You're at a social get-together and you spend more time with someone else than your partner; he/she tells you about the hurt that caused...how do you apologize?

*If you don't feel an apology is even needed, how would you handle each situation?

[NoTargeT]

1 I wouldn't apologize, I'd just explain I'm busy and use the first available window of opportunity to listen to her, with full interest.
2 I wouldn't apologize, I'd just make her understand that she doesn't look good in it, to me that is. And then make fun of it again to stress my point. It would make her laugh I'm sure.
3 Never happend, but I'd say; sorry, I had a real bad day at work, I took it out on you but I shouldn't have. You deserve much better then how I treated you just now (preferably follow up with making-up sex ) (Whenever I had a real bad day at work I would tell her in advance about my state of mind, and apologize outfront as well, yet still not take it out on her)
4 We both don't like social get togethers, we tend to stick together a lot during them, and if one of us is close to not feeling happy there, we leave for home. In case your scenario would happen, she prob wouldn't feel hurt because of it, and I wouldn't feel the need to apologize. We spend so much time together that not doing that once in a while won't be a problem.

[Vautrin]

(1) Normally I'd say make it clear I am busy with whatever. Else I will get quite a bit of flak, and I apologize usually a couple of hours later.
(2)I never make fun of people's clothing. I really can't as I am the epitome of bad dressing habits.
(3) That happens rarely to me. If it does I turn into a comedian, making fun of whatever offended me with its utter stupidity. Hardly anything to apologize for.
(4) My partner nor I do get offended at that

[TKDLady]

I would say I am sorry in all those cases depending on the whole situation.

[Scott]

At one point in time, I thought saying "Sorry" meant I'd done something "Wrong," and that other men would tell stories around the campfires for YEARS about my failure.

They might even LAUGH!!!


However, I observed Women.

Women CONSTANTLY tell each other they are "SORRY."

What they mean is "I FEEL BADLY because YOU feel badly."

So, whenever I tell my wife I'm sorry, I remember this: Its MAKES HER FEEL BETTER, and it has absolutely NO negative impact on my masculinity.

Why not just Do IT?

[IR_Efrem]

Sorry does not wipe away wrongs for me. I hate the word and I am insistent that people never tell me they are sorry. I just forgive, and I do it quickly. If I am in a spot where "I should be saying sorry", I NEVER say sorry, I apologize (sometimes, when I am sure I did nothing wrong, I don't even apologize) for making her feel that way and then I discuss it at length to get a true understanding of why she felt that way about my actions.

Often times it is because we were both emotionally sensitive about other actions.
Sometimes my fault, sometimes not. I've never had any of those 4 situations happen.

Dunno perhaps I am a jerk or just bull-headed, or both. Sorry is a crap word heh

[darkangelism]

i usually just say sorry i did whatever

[Scott]

Originally Posted by IR_Efrem

Sorry does not wipe away wrongs for me. I hate the word and I am insistent that people never tell me they are sorry. I just forgive, and I do it quickly. If I am in a spot where "I should be saying sorry", I NEVER say sorry, I apologize (sometimes, when I am sure I did nothing wrong, I don't even apologize) for making her feel that way and then I discuss it at length to get a true understanding of why she felt that way about my actions.

Often times it is because we were both emotionally sensitive about other actions.
Sometimes my fault, sometimes not. I've never had any of those 4 situations happen.

Dunno perhaps I am a jerk or just bull-headed, or both. Sorry is a crap word heh

LMAO....this is pretty typical of guys, and you need not change: Women, as they grow older, eventually realize that there are men, like yourself, that will ALWAYS, even on their death beds, believe that saying "Sorry" is an admission of "having done something wrong." I used to be the same way, until I began saying it, with the VERY IMPORTANT SINCERE INTONEMENT, and my life became so much easier.

The "discussing at length" crap becomes old, real fast, and just uttering a two syllable sound will end it almost immediately.

[IR_Efrem]

Meh, I will be the first to admit if I am wrong. I actually prefer to discuss the situation as opposed to uttering a few syllables. This way I am a least 1/4 step closer to understanding "SOMETHING." This also means she has to delve into my thoughts as well.

It doesn't always get the problem solved but at least we tried. I don't hold a grudge on these little things for more than a minute because they aren't worth it. Sometimes, perhaps in my own ignorance, I do not understand why she would either. You know how it is, "well if I can let it go, why can't you?" Which is why I insist on discussing the subject. I want to know why.....

[Scott]

Originally Posted by IR_Efrem

Meh, I will be the first to admit if I am wrong. I actually prefer to discuss the situation as opposed to uttering a few syllables. This way I am a least 1/4 step closer to understanding "SOMETHING." This also means she has to delve into my thoughts as well.

It doesn't always get the problem solved but at least we tried. I don't hold a grudge on these little things for more than a minute because they aren't worth it. Sometimes, perhaps in my own ignorance, I do not understand why she would either. You know how it is, "well if I can let it go, why can't you?" Which is why I insist on discussing the subject. I want to know why.....

The same shoe doesn't fit us all, and if you're SURE she's satisfied with this arrangement, then great....

...but how to be sure?

You seem like an objective fellow to me. I'd be very curious to know what she'd say if you asked something like: "Hey, instead of discussing the situation, how about if I say I'm sorry, and we leave it at that? I'll not hold a grudge. I'm sincere about this offer."

If she says "NO, absolutely not. I'd rather discuss it than for you to say 'I'm sorry,'" then you'll be covered the rest of your life against the torture of never being sure!

[PepsiChic]

saying sorry is easy in my relationship, we both know when we've done something to upset the other and so apologize asap we dont like awkward silences so normally once an apology has come out (and its always by both of us never one no matter whos fault it actually is) we resume a lighter conversation to take our mind off it and carry on as normal.

and according to him make-up sex is the best

[Vautrin]

Originally Posted by PepsiChic

and according to him make-up sex is the best

There is always this ulterior motive for picking a fight .