He meets his ex tonight

twinkle · 01-11-2005, 02:04 PM

I was ok with it, but a few minutes ago I started feeling a bit chilly.

Think it was stupid of me to accept it? LAst year I also saw my ex when I went back home, but that's because we had broken up over the phone after almost 4 years and a half.

Anyway, they're probably having coffee righ now...

Any thoughts?

Samson · 01-11-2005, 03:21 PM

Really, you haven't much choice about accepting it. You aren't his "keeper" and if you attempted to be, then he'd resent it.

twinkle · 01-11-2005, 03:50 PM

I know . The thing is I totally forgot - I have a paper to turn in tomorrow and.... Now I think about it.

I was a real sport about that. And, he also managed to preserve a nice civil relationship with her. I envy him a little for that. But then, they did split three or four years ago, so it's more understandable.

Merika · 01-11-2005, 04:47 PM

In your shoes.....I'd probably be acting like a b*tching fool....but I think you are handling it in much more of an adult manner.

twinkle · 01-11-2005, 05:38 PM

Ah, Merika, we could be sisters. The thing is I had a gelousy attack last summer but then I decided not to let it eat me. So I got over it.

To tell you the truth, I'm a bit caught up with school, had a paper to turn in and I remembered they were to meet... A few hours ago. Yeah, I admit I kinda sweat it, but he just called me...

You know, after last summer, I kept joking on the fact that she was rather fat - but really nice boobs, or so he said. Well, the first thing he said after meeting her, was the fact that she had gained even more weight.

I'm sorry, but I had a moment of glory here (although I admit getting out of shape myself). He wasn't any different on the phone. The thing is that we(me and his ex) are really different from a physical pov. I'm rather tall, flat stomach (or try to), I like to show off my legs rather than my breasts... Anyway, he was shocked. He said he didn't remember one tender moment with her.

He suffered like a dog when she dumped him (he totally desirved it). So I guess that makes me very very ... glorious.

I keep drinking more than 2 l of water a day and watching what I eat. Also not eating after 18 hours. Maybe I'll even start working out

.

Merika, I almost left him last summer because he was a bit of a bastard - saw I was unsure of myself with regards to his ex and was rubbing my nose in it. Anyway, if he didn't realise I'm a "catch" by now, tonight the mission was accomplished. And I had nothing to do with it whatsoever :evilin:

Good night,

Twinkle

Stone · 01-11-2005, 06:40 PM

Jeeze you handeled THAT well, I don't know if I would accept it as well as you did.. I ENVY you

Merika · 01-11-2005, 06:51 PM

I would only let a boyfriend spend time with an ex on the following conditions:

1. HE dumped HER....and remembers why.
2. She had been in a wreck and was now in a wheelchair for life.
3. She had six kids from her new marriage and an a$$ size to match it.
4. She was having an afternoon out from the Insane-asylum of which she is going to be living in for the rest of her life for killing the LAST guy who dumped her.
OR
5. I accompanied him...with plans to follow her to the bathroom and give her the polite, but firm, 'he's MY territory' talk.

I don't like to think of myself as being a jealous woman....perhaps just a WEE BIT POSSESSIVE...that's all!

HAHAHA!

twinkle · 01-11-2005, 07:15 PM

You girls are too much!!!

As confessed before, I also had my insecurities attacks.

Here's my philosophy on it: I'd rather he meets her at the beginning of the relationship eventually, to sort out his feelings. The sooner the better. If he realises he carries a torch for her, by all means "Go away"! I'd rather this happenes when we're dating for 2 months than for 2 years.

They met today because my bf while in Romania didn't call or send any sms for the holidays and he missed her birthday also. As they had previously decided to see eachother, why not now?

At least he didn't see her during the week end. These are all to myself

.

Anyway, now he sure as hell doesn't feel like seeing her anymore, LOOL.

Star · 01-11-2005, 07:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Merika

I would only let a boyfriend spend time with an ex on the following conditions:

1. HE dumped HER....and remembers why.
2. She had been in a wreck and was now in a wheelchair for life.
3. She had six kids from her new marriage and an a$$ size to match it.
4. She was having an afternoon out from the Insane-asylum of which she is going to be living in for the rest of her life for killing the LAST guy who dumped her.
OR
5. I accompanied him...with plans to follow her to the bathroom and give her the polite, but firm, 'he's MY territory' talk.

I don't like to think of myself as being a jealous woman....perhaps just a WEE BIT POSSESSIVE...that's all!

HAHAHA!

I think i'd have to agree with those rules. I think that would be the one thing that makes me feel insecure. I wouldn't be handling it that well either as you are.

Meanon · 01-11-2005, 07:27 PM

Quote:

a WEE BIT POSSESSIVE

Och aye Pet, thy cannae have that! For a start thy disnae want to be more Scottish than is absolutely necessary.

Meanon · 01-11-2005, 07:39 PM

Quote:

If he realises he carries a torch for her, by all means "Go away"! I'd rather this happenes when we're dating for 2 months than for 2 years.

That would be my attitude too.

Duke · 01-11-2005, 08:35 PM

I think it would be tough for anyone in that situation twinkle, I'd prolly feel a bit jealous regardless of circumstances too.

Samson · 01-12-2005, 08:54 AM

Quote:

met today because my bf while in Romania didn't call or send any sms for the holidays and he missed her birthday also. As they had previously decided to see eachother, why not now?

The more I thouth about it, the more I think that this explaination is a bit weak: Why, BEFORE he "didn't call" did they decide to see each other? Why is missing her b'day an issue?

Now without saying anything disparaging about the character of Frenchmen in general, perhaps we may examine male behavior: Keeping some thread of his relationship going with his ex so that he always has a "safety net" wouldn't be a function of his nationality as much as his gender. I don't care what anyone says, males, as long as they've a pulse, will believe there is a future for them where they've been before.

As you said, he's used this as leverage with you, and decided that the results were unexpectedly unpalitable.

I predict he'll continue to keep the bridge open for "friendship's sake," but regardless, he'll continue to report that she's gained weight, grown facial hair, or whatever to maintain an image of detatchment.

The last thing I believe you'll hear is how much more attractive she's become!

Merika · 01-12-2005, 01:58 PM

So.....how did it all go Twinkle?

PiNtOBeAn · 01-13-2005, 03:46 PM

my ex was a mexican jumping bean.....she could never sit still, it got quite aggravating