Getting rid of resentment

Stone · 11-02-2004, 06:17 PM

As some of you know my current relationship has just been "mended" in the last month or two, My B/F is Bipolor and was institutionalised with no contact to me for about 3 weeks, he is better now and things are going smoothly but I can't get over the resentment I have from losing ALOT of things due to is breakdown. I know it isn't his fault and he didn't intentionally try to hurt me but he did and I resent the CRAP out of him and I can't get over it. We've talked about it a million times but it doesn't help, I just stay away from him and he stays away from me, I guess this is my fault becaue he always reassures me he loves me and wants to work things out but I continue to fight with him over it I can't get over the Anger and Resentment or know how?

Any tips?

sn00py · 11-02-2004, 07:49 PM

is bipolar when your had at one point and mad the next like ur mood changes out of nowhere????????????????????????

Stone · 11-02-2004, 07:56 PM

That is a symptom bipolor is similir to manic depression

Merika · 11-02-2004, 08:02 PM

Meanon is the ace for answering situations like this.

However, I don't know how you automatically get over anger and resentment. I personally think that type of healing takes time to rebuild the trust and secure feeling back up.

Until that time, all you can do is draw a line down a sheet of paper. Write down all the things you've lost on the left.....write his name on the right. Then ask yourself which one means the most to you. Once you've made the decision....never look back.

We all have times in our past when we've disappointed our parents or someone we greatly cared for, we did them wrong, we were stupid.....but eventually as remorse sets in....we ask for forgiveness and grace.

If your boyfriend is asking for your forgiveness and is trying to work things out....IF YOU STILL LOVE HIM....extend to him the benefit of the doubt. Forgive him, try again and put all the other stuff behind you.

Duke · 11-02-2004, 08:15 PM

I say take a break and let your heart decide. It's almost impossible to recover from hurt right away and forcing the issue only serves to make matters worse. I can tell you, you shouldn't feel guilty about your feelings no matter what they may be. It will be the seed that your resentment grows from.

Stone · 11-02-2004, 08:20 PM

I love him to death, when he is not "manic" and only has been this one time, he is an awasome guy and he is WONDERFUL to Noah. BUT I am going on the cruise by myself so hopefully I can work out some issues on my vacation... ( although I resent him for making me go by myself, but it may be a blessing)

I am going by myself because when we planned this one year ago everything was fine now that he was gone for so long he needs to get work done.

Duke · 11-02-2004, 08:24 PM

Invite a friend, say a 5' 11" Canadian male named Ken for instance ;-)

Stone · 11-02-2004, 08:24 PM

Pack your bags ken

Duke · 11-02-2004, 08:28 PM

sw33t, I'm on my way.

We'll talk about finances ;-)

Stone · 11-02-2004, 08:30 PM

Absolutley we'll talk about YOUR FInances paying for MY drinks LMAO :evilin:

Duke · 11-02-2004, 08:35 PM

If I buy the drinks what am I getting in return?

Stone · 11-02-2004, 08:36 PM

A drunk blond bimbo

Duke · 11-02-2004, 10:17 PM

Is it getting hot in here or is it just me?

Merika · 11-03-2004, 01:12 PM

Hmmmm....sounds like we need a garden hose option in here!

HAHA!

Stone · 11-03-2004, 01:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Duke

Is it getting hot in here or is it just me?

NOPE It's me!! LOL HAHAHAHA