What would you tell someone you work with...

Luba · 06-08-2007, 07:58 PM

that was just diagnosed with Cancer?

(1) Would you give them sympathy by a hug and tears?
(2) Would you give them positive words?
(3) Some of both?
(4) Other?

She is still a young woman and, of course, this News just stunned her as it did with all of us that know her....

Vautrin · 06-08-2007, 08:27 PM

That is a tough situation. My dad was diagnosed with Hodgkin's disease (cancer in the lymphoid system), when I was eleven.

As how I would respond in this situation, I don't know. Probably get as much information as possible (intellectual at heart) and make myself more available. I am quite expressive, but it would depend on the nature of our work-relationship.

TKDLady · 06-08-2007, 08:38 PM

I agree with Vautrin on what kind of relationship you have with this person. If you consider them a friend then probably 3. I am very bad with that kind of thing. I always seem to stick my foot in my mouth. Of course, a lot depends on the type of person they are. If they seem to have accepted it or are at least dealing well with the news than I probably would do better with them. If they close them self off and hate the world then I would have a hard time knowing what to do for them. I am the kind of person who wants to help but I need the person to tell me what they need. Otherwise, I feel like I am imposing on them. This is somewhat a part of the situation I am having with my friend at work who has a son who nearly drown. He has shut himself off from the world and helping him is next to impossible because he won't talk. I don't know if the things I do are appreciated or not. Very frustrating.

PepsiChic · 06-10-2007, 04:56 PM

lots of cuddles and kind words. i dont care if i have a great relationship or not with them, in a time of need im sure they'll welcome any kind of support.

Duke · 06-11-2007, 04:25 AM

I wouldn't say anything, only listen if they wanted to talk.

Mondo · 06-12-2007, 05:34 AM

My old boss at my last company got cancer. He just wanted people to get on with things. I just said sorry to hear that, let me know if there is anything I can do to help and left it at that. Best advice I can give is just be positive around them with anything you do. Last thing they need is someone around them being negative.

Adonaicole · 06-12-2007, 03:51 PM

I would give them a hug and words of encouragement. They would have to be a pretty close friend for me to shed tears...just a guy thing.

Meanon · 06-13-2007, 02:38 PM

I'd make a brief comment that I was sorry to hear the news and not comment further unless they made it clear they wanted to talk about it, in which case I may offer a hug and sympathy. I've been in this situation a few times. People are so different, some want to discuss all the details and receive comfort. Others need to retain a sense of normailty and being in control, fear the embarrassment of getting upset and find it harder if people constantly express sympathy. It's useful if a close friend can talk to them about what helps.