Teens and STD's

[Merika]

My daughter has a 16 year old friend who found out from her boyfriend that he had Aides. 8O They haven't been using protection. She went to the clinic yesterday and they said it would take 2-3 weeks before the results were in. Geeze....I thought it was faster than that.

She hasn't told her Mom.....and won't until she knows one way or the other. I know this girl real well and it's just heartbreaking.

The point is....what ARE these kids thinking by not using protection. If they are both young and start out as virgins....ok. But if you are dating a guy who would boink anything that has life in it....then GOOD LORD use some common sense. These kids should know better!!!

I think they should quit focusing in Health Classes on 'Could you be gay?' and 'How to divorce your parents'..and start focusing on some REAL PROBLEMS! They should bring in guest speakers with Aids and such.

[Weiser]

seriously...i boinked alot of girls...but 99% of the time I'm safe. only time I'm not is if I know they are clean. dumb youngin's....

[twinkle]

It's a matter of trust, first and foremost. IMHO, at 16 you can't really know or trust a person. My sister also started her sex life at 16 and had a stable friend. She never used protection, because it was serious.

Guess what, the guy was a carrier of several STD's and my sister took years to heal, because that bastard never cared to take proper medicamentation. she had one mean bacteria and given that she couldn't shake it for over 2 years, there are chances she might be infertile.

My point is: protection is good if you plan to have a one night stand. If you're planning to go steady, have a serious relationship and not use protection, GET TESTED BEFORE HITTING THE SACK !!!!! And of course, wait for the results.

[darkangelism]

more then likely they are just being lazy, but get tested before not using condoms and at least be on some protection, thats how people have babies, its almost like they forget that part of it.

[Samson]

Originally Posted by Merika

My daughter has a 16 year old friend who found out from her boyfriend that he had Aides. ...... These kids should know better!!!

I think they should quit focusing in Health Classes on 'Could you be gay?' and 'How to divorce your parents'..and start focusing on some REAL PROBLEMS! They should bring in guest speakers with Aids and such.

HMMmmmmmmmmmmmmmm..............

Gee, or PARENTS could try to teach their kids???

I know, I know, I know..."They" have so much more influence over the kid's behavior:.....the media, the school, the peers, the..... "society."

Parents probably shouldn't even bother discussing STD's and distributing condoms to their 16 year olds. What a waist of their time that would've been!

[Star]

most parents talk to their kids about everything to do with sex and that includes STD's. what the kid does with that information is out of the control of parents. that's life.

I stress on a regular basis to both my kids how important it is to use a condom if you're going to have sex. my youngest hasn't had sex yet but my oldest obviously didn't listen to any of the talks we had and still have.

Kids think that nothing bad can happen to them. they feel their safe from all the things out there that can kill them. i remember feeling the same way when i was a teen. the risks i took. i'm lucky to be alive!

it doesn't matter whether you are 16 or 56. you need to wear that condom for protection. if hubby and i ever split up, i wouldn't sleep with anyone until they got tested for every STD out there and even then, i'd be using a condom just in case. it's just not worth it to be careless. carelessness can kill; bottom line.

[Weiser]

You know, the only sex talk I ever got from my parents, EVER, was my dad telling me to keep my snake in my pants. That was it!

[Star]

that's not even a sex talk!! i didn't get a whole lot from mine either. parents were embarassed back then to talk to their kids about that kind of stuff.

i read books to mine and answer all their questions and never let them forget that with sex comes responsibility and always stress the dangers of STD's and using condoms.

see that? my parents didn't talk to me about sex and i stayed a virgin until 21. i talk to my kids about sexz regualrly and i have a 17 year old with 2 kids that's had clamidia a couple times. go figure!

it's all up to the kid in the end.

[Vautrin]

Originally Posted by Star

most parents talk to their kids about everything to do with sex and that includes STD's.

Perhaps in Canada. But not in the Netherlands(!). And I doubt this holds for the US as well.

And society has changed a lot these past 25 years, worldwide, but I will focus in the rest of this post on the Netherlands. The influence religion has decreased dramatically. In 1980, doing laundry on a Sunday was seen by many as sinful.

Young people have spending power like never before (it is not uncommon for a 13-year old to work 20 hours a week or more, especially during vacations).

They have to acquire all kinds of gadgets, fashion et cetera. If commercials work, then it is hard to prove / disprove whether or not those screw kids up. Recent research suggests that fully 71% of the Dutch kids between 7-14 years of age, believes everything that is said / stated in a commercial. Despite that deceit is banned in commercials by law, it is not unlawful to use all kinds of deception in commercials:?.

Basically a kid has to decide at the age of 13, what kind of career to pursue, and at 16 make a decision on the thing here. There is still a bit of margin between say doctor and biologist, but if you are going for the doctor route, you can forget about economics. At 16 years of age, people are known to have very clear thoughts on what to do :roll:.

Subsequently, if the kids are not happy with the decision that they have made (they experience it, as if such a decision was forced upon them), they tend to drop out of school, without diplomas. And then we start to blame the kids for dropping out, instead of thinking of better ways to let kids choose a career track, and more appropriate times in their lifes. Idiotic idea, I know.

We force upon the kids a lot of responsibility, for which the consequences can hardly be overseen. Even worse, knowing beforehand that such a thing turns out to be a disaster for a lot of those kids, and doing nothing about it.
As a side-effect of this, kids have a hard time learning to take responsibility for their actions, as the responsibility is often flung on them, without them wanting it yet, nor being able to handle it properly.

Most parents here do not talk with their kids about sex and all related issues, though most kids and parents wish such conversations would occur.

[twinkle]

Mom talked to me about sex ever since I was six or seven. She told me about most things sex related, gays and lesbians included.

The message was not at all "use protection" but " men use women for sex", "sex is a weakness", "if you have sex you get preganat" etc. This approach worked on me, hahaha (in Romania there was not a bigger shame than to get preganat and not be married - shame for everyone, parents, relatives, let alone the girl. Things are changing, but people are still extremely judgemental).

I think the biggest problem is that parents don't talk to children. Period. If you treat them like your equal, you can show them that there's a LOT to learn about life and responsabilities and that there's no need to hurry. That you can't just have fun and not pay the price. You always do.

There are plenty of commercials about AIDS on tv and at school about condoms, I mean saying that teenagers get pregnant because their mom didn't tell them to use protection is really lame. Parents have to talk about SEX with their kids. Seriously. And then if the kid's smart enough, he'll listen.

Telling them only to protect themselves is not a sex talk and therefore is highly insufficient.

[darkangelism]

Originally Posted by Weiser

You know, the only sex talk I ever got from my parents, EVER, was my dad telling me to keep my snake in my pants. That was it!

And you didnt seem to listen,lol.

[Samson]

Originally Posted by twinkle

There are plenty of commercials about AIDS on tv and at school about condoms....
Telling them only to protect themselves is not a sex talk and therefore is highly insufficient.

Actually, there are practically no commercials about condoms, and many institutions within the US are very reluctant to ruffle the feathers of the "moral majority" by taking on the responsibility of parents to, as you say, insufficiently tell them only to protect themselves.

This is why I suggest parents actually supply their 16 year olds with condoms.

[Star]

I totally disagree with parents supplying their teens with condoms unless their teens are sexually active of course. I would never give my 14 year a box of condoms now because that would b