Life As An Amputee

IvyRose · 09-04-2008, 05:49 AM

My son is having a partial amputation on his foot. We're suppose to go to several people over the next few weeks to let him become aware of the struggles associated with becoming an amputee.

I was just wondering if anyone here has had the loss of a limb(s) and could tell me both positive and negatives of it or just your story.

I realize there are some inspirational stories about this type of thing, but I'd rather hear a 'typical' person's point of view rather than a one in a billion survivor that had a Documentary filmed in their honor.

I will give a little history... This is not a 'have to' surgery. In fact, the Doctor is willing to put this off for the rest of his life seeing as how my son's life is limited enough as it is. This is a quality of life issue. A club foot that has had many corrective surgeries involved, but the Doctors have given up hope on correcting it and amputation is the only logical choice.

The foot does hurt right now, but with amputation - my son will not have to live with the pain as well as, it may be able to further his mobility. There is also a chance of the amputation taking away mobility that he already has.

We were told there is a big chance of him dying during surgery due to his health issues. I would also like to understand more of the aftercare involved because I was told this is a rather large surgery.

My son's decision is to amputate and live with whatever the fallout may be. So, this is mainly for my piece of mind. I feel like this is my foot and I keep having vivid dreams of my limbs being amputated as well as queasy feelings of the whole ordeal.

We're suppose to go to therapy, the two of us. They've already asked my son if he wants to kill himself or kill others. He was in shock at such questions, but really... they should have been asking me.

If you've been a caregiver in this situation... I'd like your input too. Sometimes it's just as bad for the person close to you to watch this come to play as it is for the patient.

Thanks for any information in advance.

BridgieBridge · 09-04-2008, 09:06 AM

aww Ivy i wish i could be of some help. I do not know anyone who has experienced such. I did know a man when i was young who was a neighbor and he had lost half his hand in the war. I remember asking him about it bc it was the strangest thing i'd ever seen. He made a couple jokes and told me a few tale tales and said he did'nt have any pain and it di'nt stop him from playing around out in his wood workshop, he seemed to find other ways to make it useful. So maybe that helps somehow?

I feel for you and your son. He knows what he wants, and he does'nt want the pain, he would rather lose a foot. I can respect that. I will keep you in my blessings and good luck.

IR_Efrem · 09-04-2008, 09:16 AM

The only thing I can say for sure, through a small amount of personal experience, Is that the surrounding area will be VERY tender for a while. Probably 6 months to a year, possibly longer. Though the proper doctor can minimize this by sewing old skin and tissue together. If to much new tissue and skin has form around the created wound it will be longer before the area is desensitized.

I've never lost more than the tips of a couple fingers though, it has been more than a year and it is still tender.

TKDLady · 09-04-2008, 10:09 PM

I am sorry Ivy Rose. I am afraid I have no experience with this. You have my thoughts and best wishes for a very good outcome and like BB said, he wants this and I also respect that. Just keep trying to get as much info as possible. Maybe the local hospital can direct you to a prostheses place and maybe they have people there willing to talk about their experiences. Good luck and you are in my thoughts. Hugs to you.

Luba · 09-05-2008, 07:30 AM

IvyRose, you and your Son are in my prayers. The rest you know from my PM.

IvyRose · 09-05-2008, 11:25 AM

Thank you all.

Insightful stuff in this thread. Makes it less scary for me.

IR_Efrem · 09-05-2008, 12:01 PM

I wish I had something a little more insightful for you Ivy, but I really cannot comment more about the surgery. You and your son will be in my thoughts for sure.

BridgieBridge · 09-05-2008, 02:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by IvyRose

Thank you all.

Insightful stuff in this thread. Makes it less scary for me.

Ivy, i have seen on tv and read about many of folks of all age's having an amputation and they seem to still do wonderful things for themselves and most are just so happy to be living free of the pain they were in that they seem to get a new inspiration on life. I have seen some push themselves much harder than we imagine. It's a new leash on life for some. I hope it is that way for your son, i know you said there are other things that ail him but maybe with this bad foot out of the way he can progress in other ways he was not able to with it?

Blessings for you and your family

IvyRose · 09-05-2008, 02:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BridgieBridge

Ivy, i have seen on tv and read about many of folks of all age's having an amputation and they seem to still do wonderful things for themselves and most are just so happy to be living free of the pain they were in that they seem to get a new inspiration on life. I have seen some push themselves much harder than we imagine. It's a new leash on life for some. I hope it is that way for your son, i know you said there are other things that ail him but maybe with this bad foot out of the way he can progress in other ways he was not able to with it?

Blessings for you and your family

Thank you Bridgie.

Sometimes it's hard to think about the good stuff when the bad stuff is in your face. I appreciate your time and letting me know the good stuff too.

BridgieBridge · 09-05-2008, 02:37 PM

And pets to, i forgot to mention them, like a lil dog with only two front legs, they just get lil wheels for the back end and them dogs continue to live a happy life wagging their tail not paying any attention to the wheels behind them. For those of us that are not in a position to really think about losing an arm, leg or foot, it's hard for us to imagine. Hard for us to understand, it's a creepy thought but for those that are in the position they seem to have more light and understanding and acceptance on the matter. It may just be that your son is the one to counsel and comfort you through all this, i know you would think it should be the other way around with you being the mother, but this might be his opportunity to help you for all you have helped him. Maybe he can help comfort you through all this?

BridgieBridge · 09-05-2008, 02:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by IvyRose

Thank you Bridgie.

Sometimes it's hard to think about the good stuff when the bad stuff is in your face. I appreciate your time and letting me know the good stuff too.

No no, thank you Ivy for sharing and allowing me to be of some input.

I swear somewhere through all darkness is light, even when it comes to my own darkness, i still believe in the light. The light is at the end of the tunnel though at times hard to see. And in every thing bad comes something good, it's all about the balance. Things happen and we don't always understand them but i believe it is all for a reason. Sometimes when swallowed by the darkness it's nice to have somebody come in and open the blinds for you. We can't do any of this alone. I'm always here if you want to chat.

Meanon · 09-05-2008, 08:13 PM

Another dreadfully scary situation Ivy - life sure seems to be throwing you some curves at the moment

I know you are not very interested in the inspirational stories, but I met this guy: Home - Jamie Andrew .com and he talked about his reactions. He went through a very bad time at first: anger, denial, worse but he didn't choose his surgery. Even so, he has achieved amazing things through focussing on achieving mastery of small tasks each day and through being determined to do the things he loves. He talked about the input at the hospital - mainly physio, learning to walk and lots of occupational therapists who helped find practical ways around problems.

I think the hospital will tell him about phantom limb syndrome, but if they don't then do ask. If the nerves in his foot are functioning OK now, then he may continue to get sensation and pain in his foot even though it's no longer there. this can be very scary for people. It's to do with the nerve endings - can't remember exactly but it's a normal response and it settles in time.

As your son has chosen the op he will be well prepared for it psychologically and many amputees have a very matter of fact attitude to it and their prosthetic limbs. I think you may well find it harder, Ivy, as his mother.

Fayebelle · 09-05-2008, 08:24 PM

When I was a kid- a friend of mine had a stepfather that had had both legs amputated.

He had pain issues at times - there's some sort of "ghost feeling" that is weird for them too- apparently there are times they still feel the missing limbs. I'll have to Google a bit more info.

Other than that though- he just got on with his life. He married after his amputations. He worked. He drove. He went out. He was a normal guy who happened to have no legs.

He had a wheelchair so I have no insight on prosthetics.

He had been an amputee about 10 years when I met him and he never seemed self conscious or bitter either (they were the result of a car accident) He took us for rides on his wheelchair and let us play on his exercise bars (like parallel bars) We rode our bikes on his wheelchair ramp to the deck.

In fact- he was pretty cool in our book b/c he had great "toys"