| General Discussion Fun topics that don't belong anywhere else. Life is already serious enough, this forum is for having fun. |
03-01-2005, 07:55 AM
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#26 (permalink)
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Veteran Member
Join Date: Oct 2004
Posts: 2,255
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I had kissed at least 4 men during my last relationship. It didn't seem like the end of the world to me and I've only confessed about one of the deeds. All I remember is that when I did that I was either hurt or vengeful, so I was kinda doing it on purpose. Except for once when I planned to - I had the hots for that guy.
So ... yeah, I was shocked to see how much it hurts. In his case also heavily drinking was involved. I also know that at that specific time we were having big problems. The only thing I could possibly be thinking was that I was cooking him cheese pan̮̩ - one of his favourite dishes - and he was running around kissing other people. The timing sucked big time also just before Valentines day etc etc.
Maybe guys think of it from another pov. To me sex is bye bye. For real. It would be the only case I'd actually mean it. Don't know if I told you this girls, but... my ego is as big as a house. We'll live and we'll see how it goes.
I've cut the dead branches of my bonsai and then I slept one hour and a half. It's about 2 AM now, so I'll go see my doc!
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03-01-2005, 08:20 AM
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#27 (permalink)
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Veteran Member
Join Date: Oct 2004
Posts: 2,206
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PM. AM is the morning. Let us know how it goes.
I just remembered I kissed someone else too, ooops 
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03-01-2005, 08:29 AM
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#28 (permalink)
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Veteran Member
Join Date: Oct 2004
Posts: 2,255
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You bad bad girl!!! Did you kiss and tell or just kiss?
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03-01-2005, 09:15 AM
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#29 (permalink)
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Veteran Member
Join Date: Oct 2004
Posts: 2,206
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Just kissed, that time
You're right, twinkle. It's easy to be blase when you're not the one who's hurt. I'd like to think I'd be understanding but I have no idea how I'd react.
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03-01-2005, 09:26 AM
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#30 (permalink)
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Retired
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Florida, USA
Posts: 13,268
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I don't think once a cheater...always a cheater. There are just some men/women who, due to personality, are more prone to flirt around than others. Usually, it's this payful alluring side of them which drew you to them in the first place.
However, dating it and marrying into it are two different things.
This may not be the end of the relationship....but I think it's possible it's the beginning of the end. Someone else is going to come along who is going to fulfill more of what you need in a man and chances are....you'll be the one breaking off with the guy you are with....not the other way around.
Till then, enjoy the portions of the relationship with him that you do....and don't fret too much over the rest of it. He's not the only guy in the world....he's only a stepping stone towards your next life's chapter.
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03-01-2005, 10:52 AM
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#31 (permalink)
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Veteran Member
Join Date: Oct 2004
Posts: 2,857
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I've cheated with Greg twice, he has no clue.. I'll never tell but I would never do it again.
Going back to WHY I did it was because I was/ am EXTREAMLY unsatisfied at home so I cheated. Yes it's wrong and selfish but I learned my lesson.
Naturally people flirt, BUT him comming to tell you about it tells me that he is looking for you to either.
A. get pissed off and jellous, to remind him that you care about him
B. Likes to remind you that ladies are attracted to him, & that your a lucky girl for some reason
C. He felt bad about it.
Or a mixture of all of the above...
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03-01-2005, 10:59 AM
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#32 (permalink)
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Veteran Member
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: oklahoma
Posts: 5,765
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Cheating is in the eye of the beholder, most of my friends would consider cheating kissing.
__________________
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03-01-2005, 11:13 AM
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#33 (permalink)
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Veteran Member
Join Date: Oct 2004
Posts: 2,255
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That's why I'm staying with him. Because he confessed right away.
I try not to flip about it too much, Merika, but it's a nasty feeling - burning your fingers that is.
So I went to see my doc, it's the flu, bleah! Gave me a syrop for my caugh that makes me sleepy all day.
Heather, you're right on the money: he told me he did it because he felt unloved. I really wanted him to feel that way, did most things I could for him to feel unsecure. I guess I expected him to learn from his mistakes by "taking his medicine".
Apparantly he's not that kind of man and it eventually backfired. The most important thing, IMO is that he did it when we had problems. It's we that had problems, not him. Had he done it when we were fine, yup, he would have diserved to be called a "jerk".
I know it's stupid to say it, but ... I really am disapointed. Trully am. Hope to get over it.
Heather: girl... I have no idea what to say. In my case, when I cheated, it was over, whether I liked to admit it or not. The toughest, IMO is living with it. With the guilt. I imagine you must love him a great deal if you stuck with him after that.
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03-01-2005, 02:19 PM
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#34 (permalink)
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Founder
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: The back of my mind.
Posts: 20,571
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I agree that cheating is having sex but necking with someone else isn't exactly the way to have a happy/healthy relationship IMO.
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