Need some advice...

Luba · 07-08-2005, 09:48 PM

What would you do if you found out something that involves a good friend? It's a work situation...my friend is very unhappy working for a particular Supervisor and has asked to be moved to work in a different area run by a different Supervisor, one she really likes...and she's counting on it happening, at this time her entire happiness at work hinges on it.
I found out today very inadvertently from the very Supervisor that she wants to work with, that it's not likely to happen. I didn't even approach the subject, it wasn't my business, it was just an offhand comment he made and I was startled by it, actually.
Now...being privy to such information....do I keep it to myself and let my friend keep thinking it's going to happen for her as she believes...
Or do I tell her since we have an honest relationship and risk adding to her already huge unhappiness at work so she can accept it and move on?

Duke · 07-08-2005, 10:13 PM

I really don't think it's a good idea that you say anything regardless of your friendship. What if you're the only one that this supervisor let in on this little secret? You may actually betray their trust in the process.

Star · 07-08-2005, 10:16 PM

that's a tough one. you're stuck between a rock and a hard place. I think it would depend on how close you are to this person. is she a friend tht you talk to after work hours on a regular basis or it's just a business friendship? If it's not just a business friendship, then i probably would tell her. i wouldn't if it's only a business friendship and act as if i knew nothing when she does find out. business friendships are so different from the other ones, ya know? I trust them but not as much as i do a friend that i'm a friend with after work hours. i don't know what i would do really. this is a hard position you're in. :?

Luba · 07-09-2005, 07:39 AM

No, it's not just a business relationship, that's what makes it so difficult. We are very close, and she has shared so much with me! We sit together on the bus every morning and that's where she's told me about the work situation. It is just not getting any better for her, and she believes she will be moved.
We've also started to have coffee together, and will go on long walks as soon as the weather becomes something other than rain, or forecasted rain.
We've had some good weather, but it's on the days we work.
Anyway, I sort of rambled away from the topic I posted because I really don't know how to deal with it and I just want it to go away...The Supervisor she likes and I really like him, too, came over and joined me for coffee and and talked to me about work.
I know one thing I'm going to try not to do, is agonize over it, but it is a moral problem for me.

Paul · 07-09-2005, 09:49 AM

I wouldn't say anything only because it's going to be hard enough when she finds out, ignorance is bliss. Besides something might change in the meantime and she may be able to work with the other supervisor, no reason to say anything yet IMO.

Merika · 07-09-2005, 03:32 PM

Do you know the Supervisor well enough personally to advise what position you are in or at least them them know that your friend needs an answer as soon as possible?

Luba · 07-09-2005, 04:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Merika

Do you know the Supervisor well enough personally to advise what position you are in or at least them them know that your friend needs an answer as soon as possible?

:? Can't say that I do because he is not my Supervisor, I have my own Supervisor and I'm not in the same part of the building as they all work in.

Luba · 07-14-2005, 07:42 PM

G-r-e-a-t N-e-w-s!!!! My friend had a talk with the Supervisor that she didn't want to work for, and the Supervisor initiated it herself!!! I guess she must have noticed or heard from the Prod. Manager how upset my friend was working for her. Anyway, my wonderful friend opened up her heart and told the Supervisor how she made her feel, everything, and was close to tears. The Supervisor listened and validated my friend's feelings!! My friend, who was so worn out from all this trauma she was going through, felt elated at the same time! How grateful am I that she honoured me with her innermost heart, and I didn't have to tell her what I knew. The Supervisor she talked to is letting her go on the line my friend wants to be on, and for the first time since she's been hired, she feels validated!! So, we had to celebrate this momentous occasion by having a glass of wine after work and I'm feeling on top of the world for my friend....This is big!!!!
Thank you, also, my friends, for your wonderful advice and validating my feelings as well!! Sometimes things just sort out for themselves and I wanted to share with you her happy ending!

Duke · 07-14-2005, 08:43 PM

Fantastic news Luba, you lush

Star · 07-14-2005, 10:09 PM

that's great luba!!! I'm happy that your friend had a happy ending.

Duke · 07-14-2005, 11:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Star

that's great luba!!! I'm happy that your friend had a happy ending.

That statement makes it sound like her friend died happy :?

Star · 07-15-2005, 06:06 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Duke

Quote:

Originally Posted by Star

that's great luba!!! I'm happy that your friend had a happy ending.

That statement makes it sound like her friend died happy :?

8O

Luba · 07-15-2005, 07:50 AM

It's 5:45 a.m. when I read Duke's and Star's responses, and what a great way to start the day, the laughter has already started

Thank you so much for everything!

Paul · 07-15-2005, 01:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Star

that's great luba!!! I'm happy that your friend had a happy ending.

Wow was my mind in the gutter, I thought it meant something else. 8O nevermind....