Being jealous

darkangelism · 12-11-2004, 03:17 PM

This probably fits better in another section, but i wasnt sure where to put it.

Anyway, i hate being jealous of people, but it happens, and lately its been happening a lot. For example, i am jelous of my roomate because he hasnt been on a date since i met him, but he has a girl coming from cali to spend a week with him and they met once, i should be happy for him, but im not and i feel guilty for it.

The other situation is more compilcated because i mixed school and liking a girl, and i shouldnt have. I have a group project for class and I like this girl in the group, and we have spent some time together and she seemed to have fun, but she seems to like the other guy in our group, like i called her today and she was at his place, so when i found that out i wimped out of asking her to the movie she said she wanted to see. The rest of the group isnt any help either, one girl is the girl i like's best friend and the 3rd girl in the group is someone that i used to date. Im so jealous of this guy, cause if he didnt have that french accent i wouldnt have to compete. I want to ask her out, but i dont want her to say no.

Im trying to figure out my options. One i give up, two, i pretend like he doesnt exist and ask her out. three i could go to him and talk to him about it, cause i dont think he likes her that much, and he would prolly help me out.

Duke · 12-11-2004, 03:25 PM

It's only natural to feel jealous over someone who's getting what you want so I wouldn't beat myself up over it. I don't believe that you should let what she's doing deter you from still asking her to the movie. If she's interested she'll go with you, if not she won't. Either way you'll receive some confirmation as to how she's feeling and it will provide you with some direction or closure in the sitation.

Talking to the guy about it seems good but may not be the best idea. He may help you out and back off a little but you can't make the woman like you.

darkangelism · 12-11-2004, 03:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Duke

Talking to the guy about it seems good but may not be the best idea. He may help you out and back off a little but you can't make the woman like you.

Yeah your right about that, ill cross that option off. I learned the "you cant make a women like you" lesson the hard way in high school.

I guess also, i think the other guy is a good guy so i shouldnt be jealous.

edit:

I just asked her to go to the movies and she gave me the biggest non answer ever. First she said, im busy, i have to help my friend with accounting, so i said maybe some other time...giving her a way to blow me off and not be direct. But she said, "we will wait and see" So in my head im like WTF does that mean, is she blowing me off or is she really busy...i never could understand why god/nature made men and women have such a hard time understanding the other.

Duke · 12-11-2004, 04:42 PM

I'd say she's not interested as she's giving you non-commital answers. I'm not sure I've ever met a woman who couldn't make a firm decision as to whether or not she actually wanted to do something together.

Of course that's just me.

darkangelism · 12-11-2004, 04:59 PM

Yeah you are prolly right. I just wont mention it to her again.

I will know for sure prolly tonight cause she is coming over...though not for the reason i want, she needs to use photoshop and im the only one in the group that has a copy and our school doesnt have it on their systems.

darkangelism · 12-12-2004, 06:58 PM

Well this girl thing was sorted out, well somewhat, the other guy, me and her hung out for 6 hours today, he has a gf and so he is no competeition. She is just indecisive and said she never has really had a bf or have has been on a real date, so i think i still have a shot and that she might like me.

Duke · 12-12-2004, 07:36 PM

Good luck, keep us posted.

Merika · 12-13-2004, 11:11 AM

Instead of asking her for a 'date' right off the bat DA.....why don't you consider just asking her if she wants to hang out somewhere as friends. Go to ta movie or get a pizza or invite some other joint friends. Some females just don't want to jump in the date thing right away because then if it doesn't pan out....they are stuck feeling uncomfortable around you.

Let her get to know you first as a person....THEN you can both decide if you want to take it further than that.

darkangelism · 12-13-2004, 12:24 PM

Yeah i think she is like that, she said she has never had someone she called her bf. The biggest issue is that she is busy and when i ask her to do something she says she is busy and i cant tell if she is blowing me off.

We dont really have many joint friends, but after our project presentation is finished tomorrow night we are going back to an apartment and drinking wine to celebrate, so i will have a nice relaxed time to talk to her. Yesterday i did have a good amount of time with her and the other guy in our group, as we took him to wendy's for the first time in his life.

Right now the more i see her the better cause i get to try and show how good i am.

Duke · 12-13-2004, 08:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Merika

Instead of asking her for a 'date' right off the bat DA.....why don't you consider just asking her if she wants to hang out somewhere as friends. Go to ta movie or get a pizza or invite some other joint friends. Some females just don't want to jump in the date thing right away because then if it doesn't pan out....they are stuck feeling uncomfortable around you.

Let her get to know you first as a person....THEN you can both decide if you want to take it further than that.

Really, I usually force myself onto a woman I'm interested in. Maybe I've just been lucky with mutual attraction. Actually, now that I think of it, I've asked out maybe two women in my life, all the others persued me.

Merika · 12-13-2004, 11:28 PM

That was Wappy and Dogula you asked out and they both said NO. :obsessed: :squeeze:

Duke · 12-13-2004, 11:29 PM

That's what you think grasshopper.

darkangelism · 12-15-2004, 02:13 AM

I dont think anything will happen with that girl that i like, i hung out ith her tonight at the bar, she invited me to spend new year's with her, but she wouldnt let me walk her home, and she seemed interested in this other better looking guy. Im drunk and it hurts, i walked two miles home instead of the subway or taxi just so i could vent my feelings. Im just gonna give up, its not worth it. Not just her, but all girls, why bother putting myself out theree, if nobody cares.