Being Polictically Correct

[Merika]

could be a repost

HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:

1. She is not a "BABE" or a "CHICK" - She is a "BREASTED AMERICAN."

2. She is not a "SCREAMER" or a "MOANER" - She is "VOCALLY
APPRECIATIVE."

3. She is not "EASY" - She is "HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE."

4. She is not a "DUMB BLONDE" - She is a "LIGHT-HAIRED DETOUR OFF
THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY."

5. She has not "BEEN AROUND" - She is a "PREVIOUSLY-ENJOYED
COMPANION."

6. She is not an "AIRHEAD" - She is "REALITY IMPAIRED."

7. She does not get "DRUNK" or "TIPSY" - She gets "CHEMICALLY
INCONVENIENCED."

8. She does not have "BREAST IMPLANTS" - She is "MEDICALLY
ENHANCED."

9. She does not "NAG" you - She becomes "VERBALLY REPETITIVE."

10. She is not a "TRAMP" - She is "SEXUALLY EXTROVERTED."

11. She does not have "MAJOR LEAGUE HOOTERS" - She is "PECTORALLY SUPERIOR."

12. She is not a "TWO-BIT HOOKER" - She is a "LOW COST PROVIDER."


HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:

1. He does not have a "BEER GUT" - He has developed a "LIQUID GRAIN
STORAGE FACILITY."

2. He is not a "BAD DANCER" - He is "OVERLY CAUCASIAN."

3. He does not "GET LOST ALL THE TIME" - He "INVESTIGATES
ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS."

4. He is not "BALDING" - He is in "FOLLICLE REGRESSION."

5. He is not a "CRADLE ROBBER" - He prefers "GENERATIONAL
DIFFERENTIAL RELATIONSHIPS."

6. He does not get "FALLING-DOWN DRUNK" - He becomes "ACCIDENTALLY HORIZONTAL."

7. He does not act like a "TOTAL A**" - He develops a case of
"RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION."

8. He is not a "MALE CHAUVINIST PIG" - He has "SWINE EMPATHY."

9. He is not afraid of "COMMITMENT" - He is "RELATIONSHIP
CHALLENGED."

10. He is not "HORNY" - He is "SEXUALLY FOCUSED."

11. It's not his "CRACK" you see hanging out of his pants - It's
"REAR CLEAVAGE."

[Luba]

I've got to memorize those, and impress people at work!

[Merika]

Originally Posted by Luba

I've got to memorize those, and impress people at work!

6. She is not an "AIRHEAD" - She is "REALITY IMPAIRED."


Or get yourself a T-Shirt made with #6 on it. It's the one I need too.

[Adonaicole]

10. He is not "HORNY" - He is "SEXUALLY FOCUSED."

I love this one, I'm getting a t-shirt made that says, "I'm not horny...I am sexually focused" ha, ha....

[Fayebelle]

#1 is insensitive to the nearly A cups LOL

[TKDLady]

I enjoyed those. Thanks Merika.

[Duke]

Originally Posted by Fayebelle

#1 is insensitive to the nearly A cups LOL

lmao, but can you really refer to A as a cup, it's more like a saucer?

[Merika]

Originally Posted by Adonaicole

I love this one, I'm getting a t-shirt made that says, "I'm not horny...I am sexually focused" ha, ha....

Actually, if you made lots of them....they would probably be a BIG seller!

[Samson]

Originally Posted by Merika

Actually, if you made lots of them....they would probably be a BIG seller!

While I'd hope you'd be right, my experience has not lead me to this conclusion. Instead, this may be a BIGGER seller

"I'm not horney.........................

Period!"

(yeah that's a pun)

[Merika]

Man...you could hock those off on the female PMS sites!!!! I actually think it would be a big seller.

[Samson]

Originally Posted by Merika

Man...you could hock those off on the female PMS sites!!!! I actually think it would be a big seller.

Female PMS sites?

I was thinking of male consumers!

Well, that just goes to illustrate what a self centered typical pig-man I suppose I am!

[Ayla]

Originally Posted by Duke

lmao, but can you really refer to A as a cup, it's more like a saucer?

Okay...I nearly laughed myself into the floor after reading that one!

[Merika]

I agree Ayla. Sometimes the D00KSTER really comes up with a good one!!

[sweetbilly]

You forgot one: He is not short, he is vertically challenged.