I know people who have no love for their partner and have found it again through counselling or just through sticking together for long enough to work through their problems.
Having said that, I do believe that once a relationship reaches a certain degree of alienation, there's no way back. I'm at that stage, as with you there are specific problems which have tested us to destruction and now it's not recoverable, even if there were changes. I know that for certain.
Don't rush into a decision, stoneheather. Stop trying to overcome your resentment, if it's too much of an effort. I think you'll reach a point where you've had enough and then you'll act but these things take time to come to terms with. In the past you've reacted quickly and then when the second thoughts and doubts have hit (as they always do) you've got back together. What will be will be, just make it as easy on yourself as possible at this difficult time.
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