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lewsterrett · 05-03-2008, 06:44 AM

i couldnt sleep very much last night i slept in 2-3 hour blocks. its 6:20 saturday morning. My son is getting dressed for a band concert he has today. my wife will be attending and i cannot. it was unusually quiet in bed last night. i slept with worship music. i think the sleep im getting isnt really sleep but more of a collapse. before going to bed i spoke with my brother. he was very supportive and i really needed that. he spoke words of encouragement and told me that God was giving me strength and to stand fast. i laid in bed and thought of some really good times we had. i know the Lord is with me. i placed her in the Lord's hands. in the spirit i saw him wrapping his arms around her. i know this is a firery trial. i just prayed for my son. i pray he isnt like me. i pray he is better than me in every way. when my parents divorced i put up a strong front. i never let anyone see the hurt within me. i was 7 and quickly became very independent. i had to be my mom was a waitress at ihop. i now had to take care of my sister who was 4 years younger than me. we would sleep in an unoccupied booth. or in a storage area. my wife recently got a job making much more money than i do. so i dont forsee that for my son but i dont know what the future holds. im on a new road that i havent been on before but its oddly farmiliar. through prayer i ask God to place people in all our paths to guide us back to the road we belong on. i pray for eyes to be open and for us to look through a clear lens.
i pray for ears to be open and a humillity to hear the whisper of God. I see tears on my Lord's face and it saddens me. i repent for what i have said and done to cause this. i am going to the messianic synagogue this morning. i am in prayer whether i should go to our chruch tomorrow.

05-03-2008, 06:44 AM	#1 (permalink)
lewsterrett Casual Member Join Date: May 2008 Location: texas Posts: 30	day 3 i couldnt sleep very much last night i slept in 2-3 hour blocks. its 6:20 saturday morning. My son is getting dressed for a band concert he has today. my wife will be attending and i cannot. it was unusually quiet in bed last night. i slept with worship music. i think the sleep im getting isnt really sleep but more of a collapse. before going to bed i spoke with my brother. he was very supportive and i really needed that. he spoke words of encouragement and told me that God was giving me strength and to stand fast. i laid in bed and thought of some really good times we had. i know the Lord is with me. i placed her in the Lord's hands. in the spirit i saw him wrapping his arms around her. i know this is a firery trial. i just prayed for my son. i pray he isnt like me. i pray he is better than me in every way. when my parents divorced i put up a strong front. i never let anyone see the hurt within me. i was 7 and quickly became very independent. i had to be my mom was a waitress at ihop. i now had to take care of my sister who was 4 years younger than me. we would sleep in an unoccupied booth. or in a storage area. my wife recently got a job making much more money than i do. so i dont forsee that for my son but i dont know what the future holds. im on a new road that i havent been on before but its oddly farmiliar. through prayer i ask God to place people in all our paths to guide us back to the road we belong on. i pray for eyes to be open and for us to look through a clear lens. i pray for ears to be open and a humillity to hear the whisper of God. I see tears on my Lord's face and it saddens me. i repent for what i have said and done to cause this. i am going to the messianic synagogue this morning. i am in prayer whether i should go to our chruch tomorrow.