I have also been through a similar situation with my first wife. It was after almost 8 years and she left. Looking back at it all I wish I had the strength, back then, to do what Ivy has suggested.
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If you want this to be over, it's time for you to call the shots instead of letting her control this break-up.
If you want to reconcile your marriage, it's time to make a stand and fight to keep it together.
If she doesn't want the cards you laid out, walk away and don't look back.
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I echo your words here NoTargeT, could not have said it any better myself.
This sounds a whole lot easier than it really is though. I was messed up for almost a year before I ended up just outright changing myself over. Different haircut, shaved all my facial hair (no mustache anymore), I moved , and changed jobs. In the end this helped more than anything.
I tried to tell her how I felt but I came off crying to much and sounding like I was begging for her to come back, and this didn't help me at all. I am very glad that things did not work out between us now. It has been more than 8 years since then, all the hurt is gone and I have the most wonderful woman in the world by my side.
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