Hi Tryinghard. I separated a couple of years ago with 2 young kids and also had to get a new place. I live in the UK, here there is an agency that you can apply to instead of going to court and you can get an idea of how much you would be entitled to by using an online calculator. This way, we managed to sort finances out amicably, though there were many other issues that took longer to resolve. The amount is not very much, maybe this varies from country to country, but unless your ex is well off, you may not get much more even if you do go to court. They don't seem to start from splitting costs 50/50. They seem to start with a notional (very low) sum which is adjusted upwards/downwards depending on income and how many nights per year are spent where. I could have asked for more, but my ex couldnt afford it, so I stuck to the amount he'd have paid had we gone to court.
I would get some legal advice and keep a record of when they are with you in case of dispute. In all likelihood, you will be able to sort it out between you. Life is never easy in these circumstances, whatever is the best way through for you is best for the kids too. Unless one of you is particularly well off, compromises will probably have to be made. My ex did the sensible thing and bought again, a much smaller house. I've retained the same standard of living but have spent savings and am still renting. The main thing is we all get on. I wouldn't have believed that was possible at 6 months post separation. These early days are trying times, but they do get better
