Re: Understanding Motives
My oldest started playing an awful game....
In order to get on moms better side she litteraly started dad bashing (to mom that is)
Example of my daughters words to her Mom
It's so horrible over there - Sometimes I feel like I'm their personal slave - I never get to do anything - I'm so sad and lonely
When she was here she was normal and chipper..
My daughters responsibilites include - cleaning up after herself - doing dishes after dinner - cleaning her bathroom once a week - and clean her own bedroom.. that's like 100 times less than what i had to do as a child and i certainly don't feel like it is unfair
She even started to seperate herself from her friends and people at church with the idea of moving back to mom's house
She actually tried to manipulate the whole situation just to get mom to finally agree to let her move back in and to get mom to pay more attention to her. Of course, her Mom let her do it and tried to ambush me with the whole idea, saying all kids of *well intentioned things* then I found out the truth of the matter and my thoughts were, If she is going to move back it's going to be for the right reasons.
BTW getting the kids to live here isn't nearly as important as, mom just stoping this crap..
I'm on no power trip and I will be more than happy to listen to the judges ideas on anything that will avoid my daughters from having to live through this any longer.
The reason my daughter moved in with me was because mom didn't know what to do anymore... My daughters head was half bald from pulling out her hair (yes things got that bad at her moms house) Mom took her to a therapist and put her on 2 types of medication, which had her all wacked out. Plus she started talking about killing herself. She had no respect for her mother and was a little nightmare to deal with. She had Zero friends and absolutely no life outside her mom's house. Her grades were D and C level.
After 2 years here - Her hair is all grown back, she hasn't been on any medication the whole time. Her attitude is %2000 better, she is still a teenager and there are little teenager problems now, not "i feel like killing myself" She has 2 very best friends and is involved in school band plus her church. (With exception to a little slide backwards around christmas) Her grades almost all B's and a slightly lower grade in math (the one subject she truly struggles with).
Things must be horrible here huh?
I'm not saying I've done everything right in my life, trust me I HAVE NOT....
I just can't let her go back to the way she was.
Esp with watching my other 2 daughters slide slowly downhill in attitude and emotional state...
No way I would agree to let this just happen.
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