Quote:
|
Originally Posted by Vautrin
What would happen, if J went to the other side of Canada with the child? Is that allowed? If you can dispel those fears, as they will probably be central to his reasoning. Which justify him putting up with this kind of behavior in the first place.
|
Great points, I'm definetly going to look into that. Perhaps Star and Duke know something about the Canadian laws in this matter? I don't think she could legally just take the baby, there would probably have to be a hearing into the matter once they seperated. Considering he's the one with the job and without a history or a criminal record (oh ya, did I mention she has one and isn't allowed into the U.S.?) then I think his chances in court are really really good.
When she told him she was going to take half of everything he had, he laughed because the laws aren't like that anymore, things are more equal now. It used to be that the woman could do that but not anymore, besides he doesn't have hardly anything. He doesn't care about having lots of stuff anyway. And on top of all that, he's being forced to declare bankruptcy so he won't have anything at all to take.
You're correct in saying his child is his priority. It's funny but even though I know he really loves his daughter, the issue of not seeing her never came up until our conversation yesterday. I think as he considers his options more, he just feels more trapped by the fact that he wouldn't have his baby. He adores her, and her him, he pretty much raises her by himself anyway so I'd love to get across the point to him that he should seek custody of her.
Quote:
|
Originally Posted by Vautrin
J's behavior seems excessive for a sane person. What is actually required by Canadian law to allow for (forced) investigations of mental health?
|
Another great question, I think she would have to volunteer, unless she did something criminal.
This is really good advice that you have given me, I appreciate it so much right now. It's really hard to express how extremely upset I am by the whole situation.
I'm going to talk to him and and focus mostly on the child, as you suggested. He doesn't come from a background where similar fights have occured, his parents only had 1 fight before they divorced and it was non-violent. My parents have however, which is the hard part because I see ALL the signs and how badly this is going to end but he's still not quite sure and is trying to salvage what he can.
I feel bad for suggesting that I'd have to make an ultimatum but I was really trying to think about how to get through to him. However your suggestion that I should "persist in unraveling the reason(s) why he claims he puts up with the behavior in the first place and remind S of the future of his child". This is where I want to focus next.