Thank you for the welcome duke.
We have 2 daughters and my oldest is the one who is troubled. I am happily married and we give our children everything they need and that includes a lot of hugs, kisses and I love you's on a daily basis. We nver beat our kids or abused them in any way, shape or form.
Parents make mistakes along the way. We're not perfect and I certainly don't claim to be in any way. But, my daughter didn't have to take this path in life. All we did was love and nurture her. She met up with the wrong crowd of kids is what happened to her and the fact that today's society is so accepting of everything and the law takes away our power when it comes to parenting (and gives all the power to the child at age 12) doesn't help parents like my husband and i at all. Our hands are tied as is the laws as far as getting her help is concerned. She has to want it and ask for it. Nothing we can do about that at this time.
She hasn't earned 1 credit in high school as of yet. She has only graduated grade 8 so far. I am extremely worried for her future at this point.
It got so bad around here that we had no choice but to sign our rights away for 6 months to CAS just to keep her safe and to keep our other daughter safe as well. My oldest got extremely violent with her and us that we had to do something. So, she doesn't live with us at this time. Do we know where she is right now? no. She has run away from her foster home and now has a warrant for her arrest for breach of probation (she was supposed to, by law, remain in the foster home and school). So, now we don't only have her to worry about, we have this little innocent baby she's carrying as well.
My daughter seems to think that life on the streets is the most glamorous thing on earth. How do you compete with that as a parent when we have a few resonable rules at home to follow and she has none where she is? All we ask of her is to obey curfew, do a few chores around the house on weekends and go to school. But, that's too much for her.
She does call us on a regular basis which is a good thing. We have told her that she has a bedroom here waiting for her if she decides to come home and obey a few rules and live life like a normal teenager should. I hope that she decides to come home soon because quite frankly, i am getting tired of worrying about her safety every minute of every day. It's been 3 years now and I feel it's been long enough.
To the one who said she was like my daughter (I'm sorry, i can't remember your nickname), please do talk to me so I can have some perspective of what my daughter might be thinking with this behaviour. She won't let anyone into her head so we can't figure it out. Perhaps saying a few words to her might change her whole outlook on this life of hers.
When we have children, we play a game of russian roulette. You really don't know how your child will turn out in the end. These troubled teens come from really good structured homes and not so good ones. All we can do is hope that they will grow up to be respectful, productive, educated adults with a bright future. Hope.