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Old 04-15-2005, 12:48 PM   #9 (permalink)
Laura
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Join Date: Apr 2005
Posts: 7
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Last night we met with a priest to ask him to preside over our wedding, the dinner was great, the conversation wonderful, but after we dropped the priest off we went back to the subject at hand. Here is where we are standing now.
He is in the process of changing careers right now and there is a strong possibility that we will be moving to Ireland right after our wedding. With the uncertainty of his income and where we will be living, we agreed that this would last only until he has a secure job to ensure that a baby can easily be taken care of, which should be in a couple of months top. During that time i can give my body a break from birth control as my doctor advised. my fiance swears to me that he is not rejecting me or wanting to withold his love. We can and will find other ways to be intimate in the mean time. He does accept me using birth control in our marriage, and will not give and take away sex, something that we aught to be sharing in the future. This is his wild card if you will, we agree that this WILL NOT be a sexless marriage, neither of us are ok with that, nor will i be expected or even asked to stay home barefoot and pregnant. I was as clear and honest and calm with him as i could possibly be. This hurts me, i feel rejected, as though you are controling this relationship and therefor me, this isn't an equal decission, i'm not in support of it and that i will do my best NOT to hold any resentment or further heartache over it. AND that i need a lot of love especially right now! In my heart and mind, this man is already my husband, my family, my most favorite person. He has left me with two options here, do as he says or leave him. I choose him and i will always choose him, he is my partner. However, i will not go quietly, he will know and now does know exactly how important this is to me. But you know what you guys? After arguing and crying over this point all week, i don't even want to have sex! :roll: I am offering it up and praying that this is something i can deal with for a while and be the support and strong wife he needs right now while in an uncertain position. Do you guys feel that i am making the right choices here? He's religious, he takes this seriously, he takes our marriage seriously, and the stability of our future family seriously too. I need to stand by him and let this go haugh?
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