[Duke]

I hate to do this guys and gals but I think I'm gonna whine a bit. As you all know, it's been a pretty rotten Holiday Season for me but I still feel saddened to know it's almost over anyway. I can hear my daughter sleeping about 20 feet away from me and can't help but feel that familiar ping of sadness that comes with the knowledge that I'm going to have to take her home tomorrow.

There's a lot of things in my life that I've been able to control, as I get older it seems that I have less and less control over the events that shape my days. I feel like a slave to virtually everyone but myself and yet if I sit and actually think about what would give me pleasure while I'm alone I come up blank. The worst part of the whole thing is that I'm starting to feel like a stranger to the thoughts in my own head. I'm starting to feel detached somehow and almost feel as if I'm viewing someone else's life through a tv screen.

I'm not sure what it is that is going on with me right now, which is why I'm posting here.