[CCC]

I want to ask, is it OK to set high standards, or standards at all? Or should parents not set any kinds of standards and let children run amok?

Isn't it unreasonable to keep kids in a cage until they are 21 to prevent them from getting in trouble?

What parents can do is set up standards for children to follow. But since we don't live in a vacuum, children are subject to temptations and choices when they're not under the umbrella and security of mommy and daddy. We can hope the children remain perfect and will make right decisions. We can plant seeds of wisdom and truth into them. They will likely fail to some extent, which is the nature of imperfect human beings. Even in the event of a failure, a mature child can own up to the mistake and take responsibility for the mistake. And I hesitate to call some things a "mistake" when they can turn into wonderful opportunities and blessings. Sometimes good can come out of a bad situation. Sometimes lessons have to be learned the hard way. Sometimes people can use these lessons to help and guide others. Such is the value of wisdom.

I believe setting the bar high is not unreasonable. When you set the bar low, expect low results. No limits quickly turn into bad and irresponsible behaviour. Low standards can make a child turn into somebody unemployable, unlikable, and unfit to survive in a complex world. Then that child will really be a burden on society.

Failure is not a parent setting high standards; failure is setting no standards. Do not judge a parent for setting standards if a child misses the mark. You should be thankful for the strong family units that do. Much of the problems of poverty and social misbehaviour is typically from the lack of standards.

Hypocrisy is only reserved for those who say and profess to believe one thing and do the opposite. That criterion has not been met here.


(perhaps this could be a thread on its own)